Wet Spam or Man City would be shoe-ins but more likely, he'll move to either management or celebrity commentating = wouldn't you?

If I was one of the owners I would either sack Pardew now or appoint a new defensive coach to work with Pardew who obviously hasn't got a scooby doo about the first principles of defending, especially set pieces.

The way we set up to defend the corner that led to their 2nd goal was an absolute shambles. Cabaye and Puncheon didn't cover the front post so De Bruyne was able to put a low cross right into the heart of the 6 yard box. No one was designated to mark Toure at corners once Benteke went off, so he was free for a tap in.

I could coach a team of under 5 girls to defend better than that.

Pardew is too gungho in attack and just hopes we will outscore the opposition. He has no other plans or tactics sadly.