So i did my Best Man's speech for a guy i grew up with. He was the most totally boring guy I knew, so it was difficult to come up with funny stories from his past. His Stag Do had been totally forgettable.

So, speech over with and time to distribute the bouquets. But the Grooms sister is breast-feeding her infant as I approach. "You lucky b'stard" were some of the post-distributing comments. The breasts were everything you could have hoped for.

At this point I got very badly mullered and took a hotel receptionist to my room. I drove back from Wales to Surrey the next day.
A week later my dad tells me his work colleague had a funny story about his daughter's encounter with a Best Man in Wales. $hIt,...

"The facts have changed", Rishi Sunak