Come on, dowie101!

I'm waiting!

19/09/05

Brighton today announced their half time entertainment for the rest of the season, Score with our keeper. "Well it gives a chance for our loyal fans to do what they've always dreamed of, scoring against Brighton. As a massive Brighton fan myself, that was all I dreamed about as a kid". Stated their chairman.
Meanwhile, Mark McGhee started writing a list of realistic targets for the January transfer window. "Well shirt sales are down, so I was thinking perhaps David Beckham. And we're useless in defence, so I was thinking probably some French flair in Pascal Cygan".

20/09/05

McGhee today decided that shooting practice was required for the squad. Veteran midfielder Jason Dodd spoke after practice. "Yeah when the gaffer announced we were doing shooting today, I thought about time, as goals has been our problem all season. So I was a little shocked when we brought out a clay pigeon shooting machine, and each given a rifle".

21/09/05

Sky Sports today announced the Sheffield Wednesday v Brighton has been moved to Monday 24th October as an 8pm kick off. Sky later caught up with McGhee who was most displeased with this announcement. "How are our fans meant to travel all the way to Sheffield on a Monday night? Some of them even start their jobs at Brighton docks as early as 4am, so it's a bit unfair on them to travel back, and immediately start work. But I guess we'll make a little money from Sky, so I tell the fans this. Call in sick, and we'll pay your wages for the day".

22/09/05

The chairman revealed today that they were bombarded with calls from many companies in Brighton, that were furious with McGhee's comments regarding fans calling in sick. Some of the team were also unhappy with these comments as well. Leon Knight was quoted as saying "Yo bruv, I show up everyday for work you know. I is the top goal scorer of this club, so I deserve to call in sick. But nah, I have to show up a bust a few goal nets, you get me".
The club announce that no tickets have been sold yet for the away trip to Burnley this Saturday.

23/09/05

The squad travelled up North today for their nail biting encounter with Burnley. McGhee announces the team on the coach, and to the surprise of the whole squad, he decides to use a new formation. At the Pre-Match conference he stated "So I feel for tomorrows game we should try 6-1-2-1, just to make sure we don’t let in any goals. With Knight up front, goals are a certainty, as I believe he is the best striker in the lower half of the table". Kerry Mayo stressed the rest of the squads concern after hearing this formation. "We're all a bit confused with this formation, but we feel it's our duty to entertain the crowd".

24/09/05

McGhee's luck held out as Brighton secured a magnificent 1-1 draw away to Burnley. Manchester United's rejected loanee Paul McShane scored one of Brighton's goals of the season, with a 7 yard power-drive in front of an open goal. A draw was the most that Brighton deserved as Burnley dominated most of the possesion. Though McGhee was outraged with the referee, as he felt that Leon Knight had a genuine penalty claim. "He was through on goal, and then he went tumbling in the box. I didn't see who brought him down but Knight is not the kind to dive". Camera evidence later shows that there was not an opponent within 15 yards of Knight when he fell. A very shy Paul McShane later spoke of his heroic goal that gave Brighton their unbelievable point. "I've been practicing on a pitch in Brighton, and my practice has come off. I hope Mr Fergueson was at the ground watching me, as I want to play with Wayne Rooney".

25/09/05

The club fine Leon Knight another 2 weeks wages after finding out that he was drunk while playing yesterday. McGhee later stated to the press, "Yes we believe this was the reason Knight fell in the box yesterday, but we have dealt with the matter and that is the end of it. Knight is a model proffesional, and he is extremely sorry for what happened yesterday".

Edited by dowie101 (26 Sep 2005 4:01pm)

Brighton Diaries!! - Voted funniest thread 2005/06

ALLEZ LA BLEU!!! and red

Very good, as usual!

Nice one Dowie!

Put em in a blog yet?

Enough of these mothafuckin' snakes on this mothafuckin' plane!
~Formerly Booze Eagle~

Calm down, they might be funny but it seems like you sit at home knocking one out over these "instalments".

Yeh it was a bit harsh agreed. But some do seem to lick arse a bit.

Edited by craigmeister (28 Sep 2005 2:58pm)