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April 25 2024 12.10am

I say,I say ,I say.....crap joke thread! (LOCKED)

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Jake d'Eagle Flag in the section labelled 'shirts', ... 19 May 08 9.38am

What do you call a bear that smells of cheese?

A Camembert.

 


Put a Glide in your Stride, and Dip in your Hip,
Come on over to the Mothership, baby

[Link] Transformation is Happening


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Jake d'Eagle Flag in the section labelled 'shirts', ... 19 May 08 9.39am

I went to a celebrity crematorium the other day,

I saw Robert Browning and then I saw Catpain Cook.

 


Put a Glide in your Stride, and Dip in your Hip,
Come on over to the Mothership, baby

[Link] Transformation is Happening


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Jake d'Eagle Flag in the section labelled 'shirts', ... 19 May 08 9.41am

I went to the Airport the other day, and I saw a bloke getting on a plane whose Uniform was covered in black feathers.

He was a Crow Pilot.

 


Put a Glide in your Stride, and Dip in your Hip,
Come on over to the Mothership, baby

[Link] Transformation is Happening


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chollis Flag Dingly Dell 19 May 08 10.27am

I know a frenchman that poisoned his wife with a razor blade

He gave her arse a nick.

 


Loverman is a fcuking arsehole.

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View Southampton_Eagle's Profile Southampton_Eagle Flag At the after party 19 May 08 10.51am Send a Private Message to Southampton_Eagle Add Southampton_Eagle as a friend

What's orange & sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.

'My dog has no nose'
'How does he smell?'
'Through the open wound on his face!'

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotopus

What do you call an Indian lesbian?
Mingita

What do you call a gay Indian couple?
Ramit & Jamit

Why did the lion get lost?
Cos the Jungilist massive!

 

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chollis Flag Dingly Dell 19 May 08 10.55am

Doctor doctor I think I'm a dog.

Jump up on the couch and I'll examine you.

Sorry Doc, I'm not allowed on the furniture.

 


Loverman is a fcuking arsehole.

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View baldockeagle's Profile baldockeagle Flag Baldock (via Sutton & Wallington) 19 May 08 11.32am Send a Private Message to baldockeagle Add baldockeagle as a friend

What do you call a fly once you've pulled its wings off ??

A sit.

 

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View baldockeagle's Profile baldockeagle Flag Baldock (via Sutton & Wallington) 19 May 08 11.33am Send a Private Message to baldockeagle Add baldockeagle as a friend

Two flies in a chip shop, which one's the cowboy ??

The one on the range.

 

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Jake d'Eagle Flag in the section labelled 'shirts', ... 19 May 08 11.35am

A couple of my friends work for a company that makes Digital Radios. I went to their wedding.

The ceremony wasn't all that. But the Reception was FANTASTIC.

Edited by Jake d'Eagle (19 May 2008 11:35am)

 


Put a Glide in your Stride, and Dip in your Hip,
Come on over to the Mothership, baby

[Link] Transformation is Happening


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View baldockeagle's Profile baldockeagle Flag Baldock (via Sutton & Wallington) 19 May 08 11.43am Send a Private Message to baldockeagle Add baldockeagle as a friend

Little boy asks his father where poo comes from.

Father, a bit uncomfortable, says that when we eat things our body soaks up all the good things and what's left comes out of our bottoms as poo.

Little boy, absolutely horrified, asks "What about Tigger??"

 

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View Dazzling's Profile Dazzling Flag Sutton 19 May 08 12.24pm Send a Private Message to Dazzling Add Dazzling as a friend

Two flies sitting on a fanny, which one's the drug addict?

The one sniffing the crack.

 

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View Dulwichsteve's Profile Dulwichsteve Flag (Another Girl) Another Planet 19 May 08 12.29pm Send a Private Message to Dulwichsteve Add Dulwichsteve as a friend

What's red and silly?
A blood clot

My dad used to keep a couple of boozers...me and my brother


I've got jelly in one ear and custard in the other. I think I'm a trifle deaf.


What do you call a man with a number plate on his head?
Reg

What do you call a dead man with a number plate on his head?
X Reg

 


I'm a sleeping dog, but you can't tell
When I'm on the prowl you'd better run like hell

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