Before we start, for any lads or ladettes who don't know what a banji is, if ladies you could use your imagination and gentleman drop yer boxers and get your boy out {thats a sentence I hope to never repeat}. Look at your japs eye and you see the bit of string type flesh coming down the side of it and is connected to your foreskin, that is your banji. I'm guessing some people will have a good idea as to what I have done those who don't read on.

Was 18 at the time had a bit of a party parents where away in Spain got quite merry most people had gone home but 3 or so slept round. The girl I was sort of seeing at the time went upstairs my mate was passed out in my bed someone else in my brothers and the spare room was occupied aswell. To the parents room it is then.

Jumped on the bed both started kissing stripped off I started to head south and she stopped me and telling me to go straight for the goal. No foreplay f*** YES bearing in mind I hadn't had any for a few months I obliged and being pissed instead of nurseing him in went to go at it like a dog on heat and within seconds sumin didnt feel right, she looked at me and asked "have you just cum?" Remember that bit of string? It's split and spurting out blood everywhere all over my parents bed oooo and the ladyfriend. There we where her wipping up the blood off her and me with my knob in the sink throwing water at it making funny noises.

Spent the next morning throwing bedding away and trying to cum up with a good story as to why there beddings gone, I bulls***ed my mum and she believed it told me dad the truth and he nearly wet himself.

We don't talk much anymore........

MISSED MORE THAN YOU'LL EVER KNOW
RIP LUKE 26.5.1987-3.4.2004
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Erm ok.

Well was on a girlie night out in the not too distant past and was getting drunk on alcho pops in a well known meat market in Epsom. Friends spotted a guy and persuaded me to go up to him and tell him he looked like someone out of Holyoaks, which I did. Cue young man hanging around us the whole night. Anyway we was chatting and it turned out he went to my school (albeit 8 years after me) and he was a gynast whi is part of the GB team (This is all true I googled)

So me and my mates are outside and I am sitting on the pavement waiting for a cab and this bloke decided to whip his cock out and slap it on my head. For someone who was only about 5ft5 at most he had a massive dick.

Somehow he and his cousin persuaded me to go back to their flat. Anyway eventually me and gynast end up on a put me up campbed which sunk in the middle. After 'chatting' foreplay begins gynast is literally shaking, but went on far too long and I kind of got a bit bored and 'dry'

Gymnast then gets on top of me and we have some really really rubbish sex. I was a bit too pissed and couldn't really move on this bloody campbed thing.

Afterwards we are laying there and gymnast says to me "Can I tell you something bad" I start thinking oooooh s***. So he says "What would you say if I told you I was a virgin" So there I am at 27 laying on a campbed having just taken this poor 20 year olds virginity from him.

I couldn't get out fast enough the next day it was awful.

I'm still quite impressed I shagged a 20 year old at my age. But wish I'd have known he was a virgin (although the signs were there looking back) cos I'd quite like to have terrorised him.

So roll on 2012 where hopefully he doesn't get famous at the Olympics and get asked questions in some girlie mag about when he lost his virginity

G

You were a bit like a pommel horse then? How was his dismount?

Moving swiftly on...

It was just rubbish. He hurt his cock a bit aswell. Poor thing

He did do some handstand things in the street though on one arm, that was quite impressive.

He did have the best body I have ever seen to be fair, there is a video of him on google

i doubt any other fellas on this thread can match this. but anyway here goes.
"I once expressed interest in a girl and she didnt respond positively to my advances"
There, i've said it. Mental, i know. but true.

Laughing at Charlton - Every London Clyub's fourth or fifth most hated team -
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I'm not that silly to post his name up here