My mate has just bought a chicken farm and he wants to try and reap as many eggs from it as possible. He has been told that if you feed the male special sorts of feed it will increase the yield. So my question to any Brighton fan is, Do you know what makes a good cock feast?

In a recent visit to the United States, a friend attended a highly entertaining evening given by a former NASCAR driver who, since his retirement from the sport, has become a sucessful lecturer on astronomy, particularly expert on the planets in our Solar System.

Apparently the lecture was very interesting. I wonder whether any of you Brighton fans have experienced Dick Trickle on Uranus?

Goodness is what you do. Not who you pray to.

I am an inventor/developer of agricultural equipment and due to and oversight in my measuring seem to have developed a wheel barrow that is a lot higher at the back than at the front. (The angle is about 45 degrees).

Having stood back and considered it, I think this would suit 'Uphill Gardeners'.

Brighton Fans, any ideas where I could market such a product?

Thats very interesting but I think you should show more consideration to fellow football supporters who are just asking for Brighton fans help.

Perhaps after you have reflected on this you could give my friend some advice?

In the run up to the World Cup, he has been working 65 hours per week in the factory where they manufacture england football tops.

His job involves manually loading the vans that deliver to the various outlets and he has damaged his back.

Do you, or any other Brighton fans, have any advice for somebody in pain after excessive shirt lifting?

That's very funny. Lancing lines 'em up and BTE knocked 'em down. Made me laugh for ages.

When i see him, it's gonna be painful. Skinny little cont.

I need to replace the entrance to my garden but am anxious not to employ any cowboy builders.

Can any Brighton fans suggest a reliable back door merchant?