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Michaelawt85 Bexley 24 Jul 17 12.31pm | |
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Listed all my dogging gear on eBay last night. No bids, but 19 people watching
When I was a young girl my Mother said to me.. You listen here kid you're CPFC |
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rednblueblood 25 Jul 17 10.40am | |
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I have a new hobby. Snail racing. Im not very good at it, mine keeps coming last so i took off its shell but that just made it more sluggish.
In dog beers I’ve only had one. |
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ParchmoreEagle Belair 25 Jul 17 5.06pm | |
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Q: What do you get if you cross the Atlantic Ocean with the Titanic?
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doi209 Fighting for the weak and innocent... 25 Jul 17 6.59pm | |
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I went to the doctors the other day and he told me I was colour blind. That surprised me - it came completely out of the orange.
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mezzer Main Stand, Block F, Row 20 seat 1... 26 Jul 17 10.46am | |
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I donated the bottom of my trousers to my local library this week. The librarian said "that's a turn-up for the books"
Living down here does have some advantages. At least you can see them cry. |
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ex hibitionist Hastings 26 Jul 17 7.24pm | |
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why is anal sex better than v*****l sex? cos it's tighter, drier and more degrading to women.
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Mr. Talons Southampton 26 Jul 17 8.04pm | |
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Originally posted by doi209
I went to the doctors the other day and he told me I was colour blind. That surprised me - it came completely out of the orange. Wa-hey! My psychiatrist says I should inject more surrealism into my act.. and I think he's probably wardrobe. Have you been on that dark web ? I couldn't see a thing. They've asked me to come up with a new sustainable building material - I've had a few ideas, but nothing concrete. Edited by Mr. Talons (26 Jul 2017 8.13pm)
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HeathMan Purley 27 Jul 17 1.07pm | |
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The Cardiologist and the Honda Mechanic A Honda mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Honda when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was there waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his car when the mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?" The cardiologist, a bit surprised walked over to where the mechanic was working on the Honda . The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I opened its heart, took the valves out, repaired or replaced anything damaged, and then put everything back in, and when I finished, it worked just like new. So how is it that I make $24,000 a year and you make $1.7M when you and I are doing basically the same work?"
"Try doing it with the engine running."
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BudgiesBeak London 01 Aug 17 10.39pm | |
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Why is marriage like a hurricane? It starts off with a lot of blowing and sucking, and ends up with you losing your house.
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BudgiesBeak London 02 Aug 17 12.43pm | |
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I got chatting with a girl in a bar last night,
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mr. apollo Somewhere in Switzerland 24 Aug 17 12.27pm | |
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I wouldn't say the wife is big but she does keep her diaphragm in a pizza box.
Glad All Over |
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Cannonball High in the Ozarks. 25 Aug 17 8.23am | |
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As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door.
Touch my coffee and I will slap you so hard even Google won't be able to find you. |
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