our strikers
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 Ginger Pubic Wig  Wickham de L'Ouest 30 Oct 18 11.59am |
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Can I just say that I doubt most people could hit a cow's arse with a banjo. Either the cow is going to run away -- and it'll surely be faster than a human -- or it's going to turn around and say `come on then. let's be having you.' Not many people could have a cow in a fight. I mean, obviously if the cow was in a milking shed and couldn't turn, that's a different story...but then I ask why you'd be there with a banjo anyway. Especially if you were a premier league striker.
If you want to live in a world full of kindness, respect and love, try to show these qualities. |
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| murphyn13 portsmouth 30 Oct 18 12.35pm |
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probably one of the best things I've ever read
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| Maine Eagle USA 30 Oct 18 3.40pm |
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Originally posted by Ginger Pubic Wig
Can I just say that I doubt most people could hit a cow's arse with a banjo. Either the cow is going to run away -- and it'll surely be faster than a human -- or it's going to turn around and say `come on then. let's be having you.' Not many people could have a cow in a fight. I mean, obviously if the cow was in a milking shed and couldn't turn, that's a different story...but then I ask why you'd be there with a banjo anyway. Especially if you were a premier league striker. The Usain Bolt of cows can reach 25mph. Usain bolt can get to almost 28mph. Ironically Usain Bolt himself, despite a recent brace, cannot hit the barn door next to where the cow is standing.
Trump lost. Badly. Hahahahahahaha. |
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| jhillman USA 30 Oct 18 4.32pm |
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Originally posted by Tom-the-eagle
If we had a player at the club who was scoring goals for fun don't you think we would have played him? Agree none of the current crop are anywhere nearly good enough however I believe the answer will be to bring in someone new. We did have one - but now he's scoring for fun at Brighton. I would like to see one or two of our hungry academy strikers being given a chance. It might be better in the end than wasting another 50 mil on an "established" donkey.
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| jhillman USA 30 Oct 18 4.42pm |
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Originally posted by the silurian
His whole demeanour on the touchline, stands hands in pockets looking bored, makes no subs (until Sunday) and just generally looks fed up with life!! OK OK maybe I got it wrong but plenty of people were calling for his head a week or two back!! Like I said, it's opinions, everyones is different!! Hopefully he'll turn things round now, we will see! Have you seen Mourinho's sulky dugout demeanour? What's Roy supposed to do be doing on the touchline at 71 - a f***ing Irish Jig? I have not heard "plenty of people" calling for his head.
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| the silurian The garden of England.(not really) 30 Oct 18 6.59pm |
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Originally posted by jhillman
Have you seen Mourinho's sulky dugout demeanour? What's Roy supposed to do be doing on the touchline at 71 - a f***ing Irish Jig? I have not heard "plenty of people" calling for his head. Ok they were on BBS. No one expects him to dance around no, that s***e belongs to the c*** that is/was Pardew..plenty were bitching that he never made substitutions until it was too late and there is even a thread entitled 'the next Palace manager'. FWIW I hope he stays and turns it around again..if he can do to Chelsea spurs and moan u then I guess everyone will be happy?
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| Ginger Pubic Wig Wickham de L'Ouest 31 Oct 18 8.35am |
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Originally posted by Maine Eagle
The Usain Bolt of cows can reach 25mph. Usain bolt can get to almost 28mph. Ironically Usain Bolt himself, despite a recent brace, cannot hit the barn door next to where the cow is standing. But even the fastest PL strikers can only get to ~22mph and I'm unconvinced there is a Usain Bolt of cows. I hold most cows would outrun most humans. Plus, it's s human holding a banjo. That's going to slow the human down.
If you want to live in a world full of kindness, respect and love, try to show these qualities. |
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| Willo South coast - west of Brighton. 31 Oct 18 9.23am |
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Originally posted by Ginger Pubic Wig
But even the fastest PL strikers can only get to ~22mph and I'm unconvinced there is a Usain Bolt of cows. I hold most cows would outrun most humans. Plus, it's s human holding a banjo. That's going to slow the human down. My research has shown that cows can reach a speed approaching 25 MPH. I have to admit that in all my years I have never seen a cow demonstrating such fleetness of foot, all I have seen are cows sitting down or chewing the cud in genteel fashion.Always viewed them as slothful rather than energetic.
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| Ginger Pubic Wig Wickham de L'Ouest 31 Oct 18 12.24pm |
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Originally posted by Willo
My research has shown that cows can reach a speed approaching 25 MPH. I have to admit that in all my years I have never seen a cow demonstrating such fleetness of foot, all I have seen are cows sitting down or chewing the cud in genteel fashion.Always viewed them as slothful rather than energetic. The question is how actually easy is it to hit a cows arse with a banjo. maybe there could be a HOL field trip if somebody has a banjo.
If you want to live in a world full of kindness, respect and love, try to show these qualities. |
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| Willo South coast - west of Brighton. 31 Oct 18 12.37pm |
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Originally posted by Ginger Pubic Wig
Given that a cow could get up a head of speed equating to nigh on 25 MPH, perhaps it would be a challenge making contact with it's posterior with that musical instrument.
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| Dean_CPFC South london 31 Oct 18 1.33pm |
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Wish we could get a smaller number 10 style player. Creative and flair. Too many target men at the moment!
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| Ginger Pubic Wig Wickham de L'Ouest 31 Oct 18 2.39pm |
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Originally posted by Willo
Given that a cow could get up a head of speed equating to nigh on 25 MPH, perhaps it would be a challenge making contact with it's posterior with that musical instrument.
You've erred on its/it's again, a day after pledging not to.
If you want to live in a world full of kindness, respect and love, try to show these qualities. |
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