The stats don't lie. Palace without Zaha is unlikely to win. The issue is why we have become a team so reliant on one player. It's not obvious that Zaha would walk into the starting XI of any Premiership top six club, but if his heart's not in it any more at Palace, then plan for life without him.
Seven seasons in the Premiership and all the money that has brought in should mean that we can do better than lose to teams as mediocre as Burnley and Newcastle. Why can't we be as good as Southampton? The South London hinterland must be as if not more productive than the south coast.
No doubt more money could and should have been put in. It's always easy to spend someone else's money. Watching turgid football might be palatable if the results are there, but in the absence of points and goals, it is just moonshine to say 'everything will be alright'. When a manager says he is 'obliged to accept the result' you do rather wonder what he has in mind for the coming week's training. Try not accepting it because it isn't good enough! When he says 'we need the midfield to be more creative' either change the personnel or the approach. We must have had a different approach when Benteke scored fifteen in a season. If we are 'stuck with him' then at least let's play him. He can't score goals sitting on the bench.

Must be in our DNA we always seem to disappoint against teams we expect to do well against and pull the odd rabbit from the hat from games we don't expect anything very frustrating

I fail to see your logic. We're hopeless without him yet it's his fault we're crap.