March 12 2007

Peter Taylor

For the first time for over a year, a familiar voice invaded Jamesey's earhole after another Selhurst Saturday afternoon.

Sitting ruminatively on the Selhurst stopper to Clapham Junction after our 2-0 victory over Leicester on Saturday, a far-from-welcome presence made itself known.

"You sure made a meal out of that, Jamesey, heh heh heh."

Oh no. It was Grossfudger.

To quickly explain to any perplexed readers, Grossfudger is my guardian demon. He tempts and taunts me into mortal and mental sins and usually pops up at my most vulnerable moments (Conversations with myself, January 3, 2006).

As any long-term Crystal Palace supporter will certainly confirm, supporting the red-and-blues, leaves one eminently susceptible to taunting and winding-up.

Grossfudger knows this and chooses his moments to strike with cunning and intelligence.

"I dunno, Jamesey, 10 points out of 12 in the last four games and two of them were away. I thought you'd be dancing a jig round the railway carriage, not looking like you'd lost a pound and found sixpence?"

"Well, yes," I replied, "On paper that looks pretty good. No supporter should really complain about those results."

"So, what's your problem?" went on Grossfudger.

I sighed. "We really should have buried the Foxes today. In the first half, they looked the worst team I've seen at Selhurst all season. And it was only a last-minute penalty that made the score look a bit more respectable," I replied.

Grossfudger chortled. "Your manager is still chattering on about the play-offs. Even if you limped into the top six, would there be any point after performances like today?"

"Of course, there's a point," I blustered. "We expected a lot from Peter Taylor. Probably too much. The scenario was too perfect. Ex-Palace demi-hero player, pretty good managerial CV at club and international level.

"Returns to take CPFC back to something resembling glory. We should have known it was never on - but many of us, including myself, got carried away."

"You certainly did, Jamesey," he sneered. "You were eulogising about Kennedy, Scowcroft and Lawrence a few months ago. Do you still think they're the players to take you back to the Bigmoneyship?

"Admit it, you thought Taylor, with his experience managing the England under-21s would be bringing on youngsters when all he did was buy a load of clapped-out carthorses."

"Come off it, Grossfudger, we've got a terrific crop of youngsters coming on. One of them, LEWIS GRABBAN, came on as a sub today."

"Get real, Jamesey" he scoffed. "Taylor stated in the match programme that he had six or seven players on the injury list who'd be certain first-team choices so he has had to play the kids. Sheer necessity, old boy."

"Look, Grossfudger, we've had a middling season and we're not going up or down. It took Lord Coppell years to sort out the mess he inherited. Anyway, I'm just hoping for a few enjoyable games this season and maybe an improvement starting in August."

"You'll be lucky," guffawed Grossfudger.

There was a whiff of sulphur and he was gone. For the moment.

Email Jamesey with your comments to Jevans3704@aol.com

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