I know someone on these boards who has taken a vibrating butt plug to a Palace match.

I also know that the person whom currently has the aforesaid vibrating butt plug also posts on these boards.

"That was fun and to round off the day, I am off to steal a charity collection box and then desecrate a place of worship.” - Smokey, The Selhurst Arms, 26/02/02

When I had a bad attack of gout affecting my foot I brought slippers to wear during the game as they were much more comfortable than my shoes which of course I had to wear to walk from car to ground and vice versa.

Nearly spat my dinner out laughing

When I was a young girl my Mother said to me.. You listen here kid you're CPFC

I was taking my little brother to his first Palace away game at the Dell . He was only about 10 quite small and I suddenly on my way out of the house remembered the viewing there wasn't that great even for tall lads like myself .
It was a spur of the moment thing but I grabbed my mums telephone table from the hallway and carried it down to the station and all the way to the game . My Brother loved it so much it became a regular on our trips .

Mum was mad with me at first but it became a bit of a family joke after time . Its still sits in her hall to this day though the telephone has been replaced with a plant pot .
Take the plant and the cloth off though and turn it upside down and you will see the 20 odd games I took my little bro to carved in the wood .....happy days .

And we still need a striker

Not particularly funny or weird, but my nan and grandad took me to a Palace game when I was about 12. They insisted on bringing me two cans of Panda shandy, a flask of tea for themselves and a large box of assorted savoury pastries. We were told on the turnstile we couldn't bring any of it in so my nan insisted we stood there and consumed the whole lot so as not to waste it. The whole time we were in everyone's way and the security bloke looked at us like he knew he'd been out mastered by an old lady.