today I learnt not to put a barrocca fizzy tablet into a fizzy bottle of water.
I had no still water and sat in my van with the bottle between my legs I bunged it in the bottle.
it literally exploded and soaked my crutch and arse.
my painters whites had a massive wet patch & I had to drive home to change strides & underwear.

Not today, but I also found out recently, if you run out of dishwasher tablets, putting fairy liquid in the drawer is a major cock up.
I ended up with suds all over the floor, like a scene from a carry on film.

Kids,tired of being bothered by your pesky parents?
Then leave home, get a job & pay your own bills, while you still know everything.

Or the teasmade

This operation, will make the 'Charge Of The Light Brigade' seem like a simple military exercise.

Not today, but that people really care about Fireman Sam.

63 and three quarters and today I discovered I like courgettes.

I’ve learned that apparently penguins have a socially constructed gender.
[Link]

When you’re knocked on your back and your life’s a flop...

I found out, whilst lying poolside, that if women are doing vigorous aqua aerobics bikini tops are a poor relation to the sports bra.
Carnage in there.