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April 17 2021 8.59am

Bizarre women you've dated

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View Baires Eagle's Profile Baires Eagle Flag Buenos Aires (ex Bexleyheath) 19 Nov 20 9.49pm Send a Private Message to Baires Eagle Add Baires Eagle as a friend

Once I went out with a very fit blond Ausie bird in London who after two weeks revealed her serious wrist scars that she had kept hidden from me, when she had tried to top herself. I could tell she was barking mad anyway, and finished with her the nest day.


Fast forward 8 or 9 years... I meet this gorgeous girl in a club, and I could immediately tell she was up for it. Turns out she was a theatrical dancer at the Royal College, slim, fit had very fine dreadlocks down to her ass. I couldn't believe I pulled her and my mates thought it was great value. Shagged her the first night at a mates house and then continued to see her every few days, and sometimes she would stay over at mine. I was getting addicted to her and it was awesome.

After a couple weeks, she told me her husband had recently left her, and that she had a young kid, and would I like to meet him blah blah... I think he was 5 or 6, can't really remember, to which I gave an an ambiguous response. A week or so later we were shagging in the bath (as you do) and she suddenly says.... all this shagging we are doing, you know what.. I'm totally frigid so I don't feel a thing.
What a downer, and that was the last time we did it.

Then she says.... you see all these scars (she had several tiny healed scars on her chest, and abdomen, arms and legs and a couple of fresher looking ones), they are all self-inflected.... then broke down in tears and wanted me to help her sort out her life and to go and live with her.

I though about it for a few days, then binned her off. It was all just too much for me to deal with.

 


Mine's a light and bitter.

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View Tom-the-eagle's Profile Tom-the-eagle Flag Croydon 19 Nov 20 11.07pm Send a Private Message to Tom-the-eagle Add Tom-the-eagle as a friend

Originally posted by Baires Eagle

Once I went out with a very fit blond Ausie bird in London who after two weeks revealed her serious wrist scars that she had kept hidden from me, when she had tried to top herself. I could tell she was barking mad anyway, and finished with her the nest day.


Fast forward 8 or 9 years... I meet this gorgeous girl in a club, and I could immediately tell she was up for it. Turns out she was a theatrical dancer at the Royal College, slim, fit had very fine dreadlocks down to her ass. I couldn't believe I pulled her and my mates thought it was great value. Shagged her the first night at a mates house and then continued to see her every few days, and sometimes she would stay over at mine. I was getting addicted to her and it was awesome.

After a couple weeks, she told me her husband had recently left her, and that she had a young kid, and would I like to meet him blah blah... I think he was 5 or 6, can't really remember, to which I gave an an ambiguous response. A week or so later we were shagging in the bath (as you do) and she suddenly says.... all this shagging we are doing, you know what.. I'm totally frigid so I don't feel a thing.
What a downer, and that was the last time we did it.

Then she says.... you see all these scars (she had several tiny healed scars on her chest, and abdomen, arms and legs and a couple of fresher looking ones), they are all self-inflected.... then broke down in tears and wanted me to help her sort out her life and to go and live with her.

I though about it for a few days, then binned her off. It was all just too much for me to deal with.

Sorry, but was there a connection between the two birds?

 


"It feels much better than it ever did, much more sensitive." John Wayne Bobbit

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View Baires Eagle's Profile Baires Eagle Flag Buenos Aires (ex Bexleyheath) 19 Nov 20 11.14pm Send a Private Message to Baires Eagle Add Baires Eagle as a friend


The connection was self-harming.... not the sort of thing you really expect your girlfriend to do.

 


Mine's a light and bitter.

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View Harry Beever's Profile Harry Beever Flag Newbury 20 Nov 20 6.53am Send a Private Message to Harry Beever Add Harry Beever as a friend

Trouble is you often don't find out til after the event! I was given some advice that I shall pass on to my children: "the trouble with nymphomaniacs is when you take away the sex, they're still maniacs."

Had an ex girlfriend who dumped me and begged to get back together 3 times. The last time was because I took too long taking a dump when I should have been in bed cuddling her! When I refused to get back with her telling her I was too old for that sh1te she started stalking me, following me to work and to my parents, calling me at 2am from a withheld number on my work phone which she knew I couldn't switch off repeatedly until I had to pick up, sitting outside my house when I had someone round and asking me who was in the house with me. Not pleasant. Ferocious appetite in the bedroom but like Dan, she mentioned that an uncle of hers had sexually abused her cousin and the same relative used to bathe her. She said nothing happened but sadly I suspect something may have. There's often a reason these people are unstable and many have been traumatised in the past. Felt sorry for her. Calmed down when she met someone else but she still kept contacting me and asking me to come over when her boyfriend wasn't there. When I found my now wife, she called her and told her to piss off and leave us alone. Blocked her number and that was the end of it. One of several dodged bullets and feel blessed to finally be with someone stable!

quote=PalazioVecchio;3575091]

'you should never stick your dick in crazy'.

And i will confess that i needed to learn that lesson myself, more than once. But the old adage is correct.

I wish i had listened at the time. Had a few lucky escapes.


[Link]


Edited by PalazioVecchio (18 Nov 2020 3.31pm)

 

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View PalazioVecchio's Profile PalazioVecchio Flag south pole 20 Nov 20 9.34am Send a Private Message to PalazioVecchio Add PalazioVecchio as a friend

i recall effortlessly pulling a 10 at a party. Supermodel looks.

and wondering how all my christmas's and birthdays had arrived together. And i couldnt believe a) how easy it was to pull her and b) how such a looker was single.


well, to cut a long story short. After a few frustrating efforts and difficult episodes it all emerged. Totally frigid and unable to do the deed.

but she liked all the other parts of a relationship....the flowers, the romantic dinners, the sunsets.

I wished her the best of luck in finding Mr Right.

Not that Bizarre, this girl has doppelgangers at every party, every pub, every street.

 


from the Etihad, Emirates, Molyneux, London Stadium, the Vitality, turf moor & Anfield to Old Trafford x 2.....or a neighbourly visit to Craven Cottage...Raptors on the Road

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View The Dolphin's Profile The Dolphin Flag 20 Nov 20 6.07pm Send a Private Message to The Dolphin Add The Dolphin as a friend

Canterbury Palace is winning so far in my eyes.
I have had few along the way so will have a think to decide whether any are worth telling.

 

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View Willo's Profile Willo Online Flag South coast - west of Brighton. 20 Nov 20 6.18pm Send a Private Message to Willo Add Willo as a friend

Originally posted by The Dolphin

Canterbury Palace is winning so far in my eyes.
I have had few along the way so will have a think to decide whether any are worth telling.

Perhaps he has thrilled many with his 'Tales'.

 

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View ASCPFC's Profile ASCPFC Flag Pro-Cathedral/caravan park 20 Nov 20 7.20pm Send a Private Message to ASCPFC Add ASCPFC as a friend

Originally posted by Willo

Perhaps he has thrilled many with his 'Tales'.

Chaucer references are always appreciated

 


I used to put the manager's name in front of Red and Blue but got fed up with changing it. If someone cool becomes our manager then maybe..

Red and Blue Army!

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View PalazioVecchio's Profile PalazioVecchio Flag south pole 28 Nov 20 11.14am Send a Private Message to PalazioVecchio Add PalazioVecchio as a friend

The girls that want to :

'be your girlfriend' (romantic dinners, flowers, holidays abroad, a walk in the park while holding hands, dinner with all the relatives at the weekend, quiet nights in front of the telly )

whilst never ever

'doing the deed'


what stories you got ?

Edited by PalazioVecchio (28 Nov 2020 11.21am)

 


from the Etihad, Emirates, Molyneux, London Stadium, the Vitality, turf moor & Anfield to Old Trafford x 2.....or a neighbourly visit to Craven Cottage...Raptors on the Road

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View kingdowieonthewall's Profile kingdowieonthewall Flag glorious Goring by sea 28 Nov 20 12.39pm Send a Private Message to kingdowieonthewall Add kingdowieonthewall as a friend

Originally posted by The Dolphin

Canterbury Palace is winning so far in my eyes.
I have had few along the way so will have a think to decide whether any are worth telling.

totally.

 


Kids,tired of being bothered by your pesky parents?
Then leave home, get a job & pay your own bills, while you still know everything.

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View Canterbury Palace's Profile Canterbury Palace Flag Whitstable 28 Nov 20 4.39pm Send a Private Message to Canterbury Palace Add Canterbury Palace as a friend

Thanks for the support chaps. I'd like to think that if I'd realised that the situation would eventually amuse some Palace fans on the HOL, it might have momentarily offered a crumb of comfort from the horror of watching the dying embers of my relationship gradually extinguished with each brutal thrust.

 


We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold...

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View Teddy Eagle's Profile Teddy Eagle Online Flag 28 Nov 20 4.54pm Send a Private Message to Teddy Eagle Add Teddy Eagle as a friend

Originally posted by ASCPFC

Chaucer references are always appreciated

Wait until the Miller logs on. Hes got a beezer of a story.

 

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