I say,I say ,I say.....crap joke thread! (LOCKED)
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 richard shaw (og)65  my minds eye 29 Sep 10 4.29pm |
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i was sitting on the train and there was an asian women asleep , she was sleeping for the whole journey , about an hour , i started getting worried , then i noticed the red dot on her head and realised she was on standby
interviewer " iggy , do you think you influenced anybody?" |
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wollongongeagle  wollongong 30 Sep 10 9.43pm |
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Paddy staggers into the pub toilet, and after a while he gives out a loud scream. A few seconds later there's another loud scream. The barman investigates - "What's all the screaming about in here? Paddy says, "Every time I go to flush, something comes up and squeezes my balls." With that, the barman opens up the door and looks in - "Aye, that's because you're sitting on the mop bucket!"
We are the goon squad and we're going to town. Beep Beep! |
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 becky over the moon 01 Oct 10 6.04pm |
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I went into an electronics shop today. They had a 42" plasma TV for £25 - card said 'volume control stuck on full' I thought, I can't turn that down!
A stairway to Heaven and a Highway to Hell give some indication of expected traffic numbers |
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| jelholyoake 03 Oct 10 7.10pm |
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I just put down a deposit on a new Porsche and mentioned it on Facebook, saying, "Can't wait for the new 911". Now 50,000 Muslims have added me as a friend.
When i see him, it's gonna be painful. Skinny little cont. |
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| sxp55 South Norwood 03 Oct 10 7.18pm |
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my sister just got a job in boots.....she's a prostitute.
@sxp55555 |
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Cannonball  High in the Ozarks. 04 Oct 10 2.22am |
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How many animals can you fit in a pair of tights ??
Touch my coffee and I will slap you so hard even Google won't be able to find you. |
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| Hoof Hearted 05 Oct 10 12.43pm | |
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My mrs has complained that I keep pushing her around and talking behind her back.... What's she expect..... she's in a fcuking wheelchair!
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| 87eagle london 05 Oct 10 1.57pm |
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Quote crystal balls at 19 May 2010 10.53pm
I'm thinking of getting a loft conversion......but that's another storey..... oh dear
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| 87eagle london 05 Oct 10 2.58pm |
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Quote Hoof Hearted at 04 Sep 2010 10.32am
I drove past an RAC van the other day and the driver was crying and seemed very upset. I thought to myself...he's heading for a breakdown, that fella.
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| Hoof Hearted 05 Oct 10 4.32pm | |
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Why did the baker have brown fingers? He kneaded a sh1t!
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| jelholyoake 05 Oct 10 10.14pm |
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Shagged a girl with eczema last night. Cracking tits.
When i see him, it's gonna be painful. Skinny little cont. |
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| jelholyoake 05 Oct 10 10.15pm |
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Shagged a deaf and dumb dwarf last night. Had to break her fingers to stop her telling anyone.
When i see him, it's gonna be painful. Skinny little cont. |
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