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Heard It All Before... (LOCKED)

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Red Card - User has been banned Piper Flag BROMLEY 12 Oct 11 1.13pm


News from Thailand:

The Bangkok skirts are taking the city by storm...


What would FH do with his camera behind the model?

bangkokskirt3A.png Attachment: bangkokskirt3A.png (351.54Kb)

 

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View jamiemartin721's Profile jamiemartin721 Flag Reading 12 Oct 11 3.11pm Send a Private Message to jamiemartin721 Add jamiemartin721 as a friend

Quote Mr Statto at 11 Oct 2011 7.08pm

Quote jamiemartin721 at 11 Oct 2011 4.33pm

Quote Piper at 11 Oct 2011 1.08pm

Incentives can cause miracles!


Miracle In The Alcohol Aisle...

Girls in wheelchairs are sexy.


Easier to catch you mean!

As long as you remember to 'initiate foreplay at the bottom of the hill'


 


"One Nation Under God, has turned into One Nation Under the Influence of One Drug"
[Link]

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View miles18's Profile miles18 Flag Telford 12 Oct 11 4.37pm Send a Private Message to miles18 Add miles18 as a friend

Brought an ipad & Steve Jobs dies, brought a Blackberry & BBM dies, so I've just invested in an Brighton calender..... fingers crossed!

 


Married, have a baby girl (Poppy), happy and loving life.

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Red Card - User has been banned Piper Flag BROMLEY 13 Oct 11 9.15pm

It can't be done?

Where there's a will there's a way...

willpower 00899mws.png Attachment: willpower 00899mws.png (927.43Kb)

 

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Red Card - User has been banned Piper Flag BROMLEY 15 Oct 11 12.30am

Can a story be true and funny?

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases:

A.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959...

B.
A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive...

C.
A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age...

D.
A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet...


E.
A billion Pounds ago was only 13 hours and 12 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it...

 

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View serial thriller's Profile serial thriller Flag The Promised Land 16 Oct 11 3.31pm Send a Private Message to serial thriller Add serial thriller as a friend

Quote Piper at 15 Oct 2011 12.30am

Can a story be true and funny?

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases:

A.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959...

B.
A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive...

C.
A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age...

D.
A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet...


E.
A billion Pounds ago was only 13 hours and 12 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it...


Clearly not...

 


If punk ever happened I'd be preaching the law, instead of listenin to Lydon lecture BBC4

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View St Patrick's Profile St Patrick Flag Wimbledon 16 Oct 11 7.58pm Send a Private Message to St Patrick Add St Patrick as a friend

Quote miles18 at 12 Oct 2011 4.37pm

Brought an ipad & Steve Jobs dies, brought a Blackberry & BBM dies, so I've just invested in an Brighton calender..... fingers crossed!

I hope your wish doesn't work out.
We want Brighton to stay alive and beat the twice a year.

 

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View crystal balls's Profile crystal balls Flag The Garden of Earthly Delights 16 Oct 11 8.04pm Send a Private Message to crystal balls Add crystal balls as a friend

Quote St Patrick at 16 Oct 2011 7.58pm

Quote miles18 at 12 Oct 2011 4.37pm

Brought an ipad & Steve Jobs dies, brought a Blackberry & BBM dies, so I've just invested in an Brighton calender..... fingers crossed!

I hope your wish doesn't work out.
We want Brighton to stay alive and beat the twice a year.


Nice holiday? Meet anyone playing the pipes?

 


I used to be immortal

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View St Patrick's Profile St Patrick Flag Wimbledon 16 Oct 11 8.04pm Send a Private Message to St Patrick Add St Patrick as a friend

WHAT A COINCIDENCE.

A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne...

The woman perks up and says, 'How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne,too!'

'What a coincidence' the farmer says. 'This is a special day for me... I am celebrating'

'This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating!' says the woman.

'What a coincidence!' says the farmer! As they clinked glasses the man asked, 'What are you celebrating?'

'My husband and I have been trying to have a child and today my Gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!'

'What a coincidence,' says the man. 'I'm a chicken farmer and for years all of my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.'

'That's great!' says the woman. 'How did your chickens become fertile?'

'I used a different cock,' he replied.


The woman smiled and said, 'What a coincidence.'

 

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View crystal balls's Profile crystal balls Flag The Garden of Earthly Delights 16 Oct 11 8.14pm Send a Private Message to crystal balls Add crystal balls as a friend

Quote St Patrick at 16 Oct 2011 8.04pm

WHAT A COINCIDENCE.

A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne...

The woman perks up and says, 'How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne,too!'

'What a coincidence' the farmer says. 'This is a special day for me... I am celebrating'

'This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating!' says the woman.

'What a coincidence!' says the farmer! As they clinked glasses the man asked, 'What are you celebrating?'

'My husband and I have been trying to have a child and today my Gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!'

'What a coincidence,' says the man. 'I'm a chicken farmer and for years all of my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.'

'That's great!' says the woman. 'How did your chickens become fertile?'

'I used a different cock,' he replied.


The woman smiled and said, 'What a coincidence.'

You must've heard that from a pipe player, surely?

 


I used to be immortal

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View jamiemartin721's Profile jamiemartin721 Flag Reading 17 Oct 11 1.57pm Send a Private Message to jamiemartin721 Add jamiemartin721 as a friend

Quote Piper at 15 Oct 2011 12.30am

Can a story be true and funny?

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases:

A.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959...

B.
A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive...

C.
A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age...

D.
A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet...


E.
A billion Pounds ago was only 13 hours and 12 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it...

US or UK billion? Makes a big difference.

 


"One Nation Under God, has turned into One Nation Under the Influence of One Drug"
[Link]

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View Seth's Profile Seth Flag On a pale blue dot 18 Oct 11 2.11pm Send a Private Message to Seth Add Seth as a friend

Quote jamiemartin721 at 17 Oct 2011 1.57pm

Quote Piper at 15 Oct 2011 12.30am

Can a story be true and funny?

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases:

A.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959...

B.
A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive...

C.
A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age...

D.
A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet...


E.
A billion Pounds ago was only 13 hours and 12 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it...

US or UK billion? Makes a big difference.


Like most of these emails which fly about between idiots for years on end (this one goes back to at least 2003), it contains a grain of truth.

It was obviously referring to US$'s though rather than 's as most of the idiots who keep this kind of crap circulating are American:

[Link]

Edited by Seth (18 Oct 2011 2.12pm)

 


"You can feel the stadium jumping. The stadium is actually physically moving up and down"
FA Cup MOTD 24/4/16

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