I hate my cat. What should I do?

So you get an animal which is by nature an animal that does its own thing. You have now decided you hate it and are asking a football forum what to do.

Why did you get it and what were your thoughts about the potential outcome when you did get it?

So why don't you have a cat anymore? What happened to it?

1. Yes.

2. I rescued the cat because I am kind. I also rescued her mother. We decided to get cats because the guinea pigs kept dying - I'd assumed they were a bit more robust.

Earlier I made some home-made beef burgers. Whilst they were cooking, I had a cheese-topped burger bap waiting on the side - similar to this: [Link]

I turned away for a moment, when I looked back she had licked the cheese part, which in my opinion is bang out of order. You just don't go around licking people's food. This is why I'm pissed off.

Also, the other night I brought a lady back to my house. The situation had foundations for sexy. I pulled the cat out to show my 'sensitive' side, explained I got her from a rescue home and had hand-reared her yada yada yada. Suitably enamoured by my caring philanthropic outlook, said lady was duly seduced. Anyway, at some point the kitten crept back into the room. She then pissed on my bed during sex. Literally, mid thrust.

Managed to change the bedding. With a boner this is embarrassing and you feel ridiculous. Got the situation back up and running again. All going well. Then she creeps back in and pisses on the bed again! Twice, in about ten minutes. How does a tiny animal even produce that much liquid? Any amorous feelings are ruined - animals, pissing etc - this just isn't my thing.

I have now run out of bedding. I have to steal my son's bedding (he was at his mum's), which is too small and left me with cold feet. Technically we finished the situation, but all I could think about was how much washing I had to do. I also used the phrase "please don't get fluids on my son's duvet" which, as soon as I said it, made me feel like a bad parent for having allowed this scenario to happen.

A few weeks ago, I was working really late, sat on my bed with a laptop. It's literally about 1 am. I'm tired and thankful to be finished. I pull back the duvet that I've been sat on for hours ready for a deserved sleep, only to find someone has pissed under the bedding. This must have happened while I was there, and at no point did anyone ask to go outside. I hold back the anger because I know it doesn't achieve anything. So I take the duvet (again) off my son's bed, and find that someone has also pissed under his bedding. 1am and no f***ing bed to sleep in. t***tish behaviour.

There have been several occasions where she's taken a dump on my son's bed.

I have more stories. Most involve piss and s***.

Like I said

Life is too short

You should feel no responsibility. Don't put up with it. Find some other mug

I wouldn't keep an incontinent kitty

You can't hate the cat for it's behaviour if you've not attempted to train it or control it's environment.

You allowed it to roam around your house and it doesn't know it is not allowed to mark it's territory indoors.

I would suggest that unless you want this to keep happening you should...

1. Get it trained by an animal behaviourist
2. Restrict it's movement around your house
3. Get it rehomed if you can't afford to or be bothered to "upgrade" your cat!

The cat will get a more rewarding life and you'll feel better towards him/her after!