It's almost as banale as 'if you had a choice what animal would you be?', but not quite. So if you had to spend the rest of your life without one of these comestibles which one would it be? Personally I'd ditch fruit - without wishing to be my usual irritating, forthright self fruit-eaters are basically pretentious and middle class, like people who eat pasta out of a bowl - occasionally fresh fruit is pleasant but not nearly often enough, pith and tasteless mushiness causing one to gag is the all too familiar experience - pips and brown bits - yuk. No, Stilton, Gruyere and welsh Rarebit for me. But you may be offended by this. If so please give us your fruity argument and fight back against us cheesers.

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Ditch cheese. Disgusting stuff. Used in far too many dishes

When I was a young girl my Mother said to me.. You listen here kid you're CPFC

Don't you call me a barbarian - just because I like my brie with either bacon (in a lightly toasted Panini)or with redcurrant jelly...... then there is

Stilton with a glass or two of fine port

Wensleydale on a slab of fruitcake

Mature farmhouse cheddar in a proper ploughmans'

Red Leicester, lightly grilled on toast

Green Sage Derby with a sharp pickle on the side

etc. etc. etc..... Mmmmmmmm cheese for me every time!

A stairway to Heaven and a Highway to Hell give some indication of expected traffic numbers

I can't live without cheese. Cheddar, the stronger the better, I love it when it hurts your teeth when eating it!

Enjoy The Ride!

If I were banned from cheese I'd have to inject e-coli every other day. I fvcking love the stuff. And fruit. Insect sh1t an 'all if picking wild.

Big chest and massive boobs

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