I had a mate whose life long dream was to be hit by a steam train. It happened last week, chuffed to bits he was.

I saw a man talking to a cheetah the other day........I thought,"he's trying to pull a fast one"

Confucius say, man who walk into door, is bound to Bangkok.

(Delivered in cod oriental accent).

"Then from the wing, Vince Hilaire found the head of Ian Walsh, and Selhurst Park sensed a real victory"
Burridge, Hinshelwood, Sansom, Kember, Cannon, Gilbert, Nicholas, Murphy, Swindlehurst, Walsh, Hilaire.

A man lying on the beach sunbathing, wearing nothing but a cap on his cock. A woman passes & remarks 'If you were any sort of gentleman you'd lift your hat to a lady'

The man replies 'If you weren't so f***ing ugly the hat would lift itself!

Edited by Southampton_Eagle (24 Jun 2008 2:45pm)

A shark went to an underwater disco and pulled a mussel.

Edited by Deleagle (24 Jun 2008 9:18pm)

What can this strange device be?
When I touch it it gives forth a sound.

Eagles fit fans squad number 21, group 2

- =

the bloke cracks me up,I havent got a dvd I just watched him on youtube,he walks out on stage wearing a pink curly frizzy wig and a stick in his hand and says "a word of advice,don't try and eat candy floss on a rollercoaster"