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I say,I say ,I say.....crap joke thread! (LOCKED)
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 87eagle  london 10 Dec 09 12.51pm |
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?
For being out standing in his field.
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| lanzarote ron East Grinstead 13 Dec 09 6.42pm |
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The homeless problem would be solved if the Big Issue had tits in it
When you're dead you don't know you're dead.
It is difficult only for the others.
It's the same when you're stupid.
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The Sash  Now residing in Epsom - How Posh 17 Dec 09 9.42am |
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My son is very excited at the new sports teacher joining his school and came home with a letter last week.
The new teacher is a former Chinese gymnastic prodigy who sadly lost a leg in a car crash and had to give up the sport professionally.
Wun Jim Shu joins the staff next week.
As far as the rules go, it's a website not a democracy - Hambo 3/6/2014
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| Dazzling Sutton 17 Dec 09 9.52am |
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Marks and Spencers new advert states that it wouldn't be Christmas without M & S.
They're right, it would be Chrita.
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| asquithd Carshalton 17 Dec 09 10.11am |
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Why did the manatee's house fall down?
Because there are nar-walls in the ocean.
I was there
19/12/2006
My website - it has over 300 free things to do in London - ideal for parents or students, or anyone really
[Link]
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| TomThePalaceFanatic 17 Dec 09 4.00pm |
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Been offered eight legs of venison for Christmas for £150. Do you think thats two deer?
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Cannonball  High in the Ozarks. 17 Dec 09 6.27pm |
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Did you hear about the thoughtful Scotsman who was heading out to the pub ? He turned to his wee wife before leaving and said, 'Margaret - put your hat and coat on lassie.'
She replied, ' Awe Jock that's nice - are you taking me to the pub with you ?'
'Nah, Jock replied, I'm switching the central heating off while I'm oot.'
Touch my coffee and I will slap you so hard even Google won't be able to find you.
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| Cannonball High in the Ozarks. 20 Dec 09 6.35pm |
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“Do ya know da difference between a Scotsman and a canoe?”
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“A canoe will sometimes tip,”
Touch my coffee and I will slap you so hard even Google won't be able to find you.
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| shaness Not a million miles from here. 27 Dec 09 2.30pm |
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How do you get a gay man to fvck a woman?
s*** in her c***!
I am NOT going to a titty bar with John Inverdale! - Rob Brydon
Just been to a new Japanese/Jewish fusion restaurant. SOSUMI
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Don Rogers Tache  hanging around the local Taco Bell... 28 Dec 09 1.26pm |
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Which one is the odd one out.... a shark, a lobster, a crab or a Scouser?
The Shark!
The other 3 pinch like f**k and wear shell suits.
I know you are but what am I?
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| Don Rogers Tache hanging around the local Taco Bell... 28 Dec 09 1.28pm |
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For Sale: Stairlift
Unwanted xmas present!
Call Deirdre Barlow on 01612864263.
I know you are but what am I?
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| asianeagle Hampshire 05 Jan 10 8.19pm |
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What has 4 legs and goes "Boo" ?
A cow with a cold
Grabbing defeat from the jaws of victory
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Johnny Eagles  berlin 08 Jan 10 11.37am |
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Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Where you left him.
...we must expand...get more pupils...so that the knowledge will spread...
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| Johnny Eagles berlin 08 Jan 10 11.39am |
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Why are so many people named Smith in the phone book?
Because they have phones.
...we must expand...get more pupils...so that the knowledge will spread...
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| jelholyoake 09 Jan 10 9.59am |
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Fatastic, i've just discovered Twitter.
It's the area between my girlfriends tw4t and her sh1tter.
When i see him, it's gonna be painful. Skinny little cont.
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| Don Rogers Tache hanging around the local Taco Bell... 09 Jan 10 9.46pm |
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Quote Deleagle at 09 Jan 2010 8:39pm
It's been so cold up North that scousers have been seen with their hands in THEIR pockets!!
 
I know you are but what am I?
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| Old Chap Orpington 13 Jan 10 2.56pm |
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Old man back from Thailand with his new Thai bride
Lying in bed, the Thai bride is playing with his manhood, slowly up and down, and the old boy says "You must love that, you haven't left it alone since we got back."
The bride replied, "Not really, I just miss mine."
Trivial fact - Palace used to win 5-1 at least once a season, maybe next season?
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| Johnny Eagles berlin 15 Jan 10 11.07am |
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What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
...we must expand...get more pupils...so that the knowledge will spread...
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